Best Superbowl halftime show ever?!?

I've watched a lot of Superbowls. Yes, genius, I'm older than most of you. And although the game itself was actually watchable for a fucking change, the commercials were shit. Ohhhhh, Budweiser went back to HORSES again! WOW! Godaddy.com has hot chicks with big breasts! AMAZING! Hulu got Alec Baldwin because I'm guessing Carrot Top wasn't available for a fucking million dollars worth of air time. AWESOME! Yes, the sarcasm is intended fucknuts. Don't get your Ambercrombies all in a fit over it.

But Bruce Springsteen OWNED the whole damn show. He's got to be......what.....80 now? Yet he didn't look a day over 62! And he came back with the original E Street Band! Yes, even the dudes from the Conan show. There may be some debate over what was his best moment. Was it jumping on top of a piano like Tom Cruise on an Oprah couch? Or the guitar swinging? Or, my personal favorite, the KICK ASS I STILL FUCKING ROCK power slide! Did you see that shit?!? He did a power slide BALLS FIRST into a camera. As the camera man composed himself after thinking "Omg, Bruce Springsteen's balls were just inches from my face", he put the camera on the face of Mr. Springsteen. And, honestly, I'm not sure if that smile from Bruce was one of sheer rock and roll joy look, or one of having your fucking balls shoved into a camera lens yet the "show must go on" look. Either way, it was fantastic! The biggest surprise: nobody by the last name Jackson, Spears, or Timberlake to ruin the thing.

Plus, I swear I saw the Bone-us brothers....errrrrr.....I mean JONAS brothers in the audience taking notes on how to actually be a fucking rock star! So now the game is done. I have ate Nachos covered with disgusting cheese like products. I have suffered the sacrifice called the "lack of internet time" to watch grown men pat each other on the ass for a "nice catch". SIDENOTE: Homosexual men often pat each other on the ass for the same reason. Just saying.

But, Bruce, you were worth the whole thing dude! Superbowls may suck, but you, my friend, will always rock! You have power slid your way into my music collection again. You can be my catcher anytime.